Every leader talks about culture. But let’s be honest—it’s not built by posters, slogans, or slick mission statements.
Culture is built by what you tolerate.
If you accept poor performance, quiet defiance, or vague communication, those behaviors quietly become the norm—regardless of your organization’s stated values.
After 20+ years in military leadership and coaching leaders around the world, I’ve identified three subtle but powerful forces that erode performance from the inside out. They’re easy to overlook, but incredibly damaging if ignored.
Let’s break them down—and more importantly, let’s fix them.
Silent Killer #1: Tolerating Mediocrity
The Quiet Slide Into “Just Enough”
Mediocrity doesn’t announce itself—it creeps in quietly. Maybe someone misses a deadline, and you let it go. Maybe excuses become more common than results. And suddenly, your high-performance culture feels… average.
Here’s the truth:
Every time you let mediocrity slide, you’re signaling that excellence is optional.
Eventually, the best team members check out. Performance dips. And you, as the leader, end up carrying more than your share.
What to Do Instead:
- Set and share clear standards. Your team can’t hit a target they can’t see.
- Coach behaviors, not people. Be clear, kind, and consistent.
- Separate reasons from excuses. Emergencies happen. Poor choices happen too. Know the difference.
- Celebrate effort and growth. Don’t just reward outcomes—reward improvement.
What you condone today becomes your culture tomorrow.
Silent Killer #2: Tolerating Passive Resistance
When Quiet Pushback Takes Root
You know the signs:
- Silence in meetings
- Quiet eye rolls (literal or virtual)
- “Sure, whatever you say…”
- Rule-breaking done under the radar
Passive resistance kills engagement and makes accountability feel optional. The longer you let it go, the harder it is to regain momentum.
What to Do Instead:
- Invite healthy dissent. Say: “What do I not know about this?”
- Don’t accept silent compliance. If someone says, “You’re the boss,” respond: “Yes, but I need your input too.”
- Address micro-behaviors early. Side comments and quiet disengagement are symptoms of deeper problems.
- Use 1:1s to surface truth. People often speak more candidly when the spotlight is off.
- Create psychological safety. Engagement starts with trust.
A culture of performance can’t grow in silence. It needs challenge, feedback, and honesty.
Silent Killer #3: Tolerating Poor Communication
Ambiguity Is the Enemy of Execution
Few things cause more waste than vague expectations and unclear updates.
If you’re seeing missed handoffs, inconsistent performance, or confusion around direction—poor communication is likely the root cause.
Even worse? It often starts with leadership. If we aren’t clear, we can’t expect our teams to be.
What to Do Instead:
- Overcommunicate during uncertainty. Better to repeat than to leave people guessing.
- Be specific about outcomes and timelines. “By Friday at noon” beats “ASAP” every time.
- Use the mirroring method. Ask your team to reflect instructions back in their own words—not as a test, but as a clarity check.
- Encourage clarifying questions. Make it safe and expected to ask for clarity.
- Fix breakdowns fast. Don’t assign blame. Identify the gap and improve the process.
Clear is kind. Vague is careless.
Final Thought: What You Tolerate, You Teach
You can’t coach your way into high performance if you tolerate mediocrity, resistance, and confusion. Your team learns more from what you walk past than from what you say aloud.
Ask Yourself:
- What have I let slide recently?
- Is it strengthening or eroding the culture I want?
Three Habits to Reclaim Culture:
✅ Correct quietly. Celebrate loudly.
✅ Self-audit weekly. Ask: What am I tolerating?
✅ Lead by example. Model what you want your culture to become.
Culture isn’t built in keynotes or strategy decks.
It’s built in the moments no one else notices—but everyone feels.
Bringing It All Together
A high-performance culture starts with one decision: to stop tolerating what doesn’t belong.
To get there:
- Coach instead of condone.
- Invite truth instead of silence.
- Choose clarity instead of confusion.
What you allow becomes what you’re known for.
So the real question is:
What are you done tolerating?
Want More?
If this article hit home, pass it on to a teammate or fellow leader. You never know who might need it today.
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About the Author
Scott McCarthy is a senior Canadian Army officer and founder of Moving Forward Leadership. He coaches managers, directors, and emerging leaders on how to lead with clarity, connection, and conviction—without burning out.