For nearly 24 years, I’ve worn the uniform of the Canadian Armed Forces. In that time, I’ve led at every level—through crises and calm, in operations big and small, across diverse teams and complex missions. The military has a way of teaching leadership lessons the hard way, and believe me, I’ve taken my fair share of lumps. But with every setback came a breakthrough, and it’s those lessons—earned through sweat, reflection, and accountability—that I want to pass along to you.
Whether you’re leading a team in the boardroom, the classroom, or on the factory floor, the truths I’ve lived as a military officer can help you become a more effective, empathetic, and resilient leader. This article dives into five of the most powerful leadership lessons I’ve learned from my career—lessons that continue to shape how I show up every single day. They aren’t reserved for soldiers or CEOs. They’re for anyone who leads with purpose and wants to get better at it.
1. Lead by Example—Even When It’s Hard
In leadership, there’s no “do as I say, not as I do.” That mindset erodes trust faster than any mistake you’ll ever make. In the military, leading by example isn’t aspirational—it’s operationally required.
“I am the reason for our failures; you are the reason for our successes.” — Scott McCarthy
That quote has guided me for years, across every command post I’ve held—from leading an 80-person platoon at 24 to overseeing a $13 million operating budget and over $4 billion in assets today. And every time I’ve made a mistake, I’ve stood in front of my team and owned it. Because leadership isn’t about being flawless—it’s about having the integrity to admit when you’re not.
But leading by example also means showing up with consistency and humanity. Every morning, I start my day not with emails, but with my team. I grab a coffee and post up by my office doorframe, making time for casual, genuine conversations. No agendas. Just people talking about their lives. This daily practice builds more than rapport—it builds the kind of connection that fuels commitment.
✅ Takeaway: Integrity is your leadership currency. When your people see you model accountability and humanity, they’ll mirror it back—and you’ll start building real psychological safety, one interaction at a time.
2. Mission Clarity Isn’t Optional—It’s Leadership 101
Ever see a team in chaos? It usually boils down to a poorly defined mission. In the military, clarity saves lives. In business, it saves time, morale, and money.
On a reconnaissance mission with a specialized 10-person team, I started the operation the way I always do—with clarity. I explained our desired end state: not just what we needed to do, but why it mattered. Then I turned to my team—logistics, medical, communications, operations—and gave them the space to contribute.
This wasn’t about barking orders. It was about giving direction, then creating room for expertise. That approach paid off. When things got tough, they didn’t freeze—they adapted. Because they understood the mission and their place in it.
✅ Takeaway: Clear missions create confident teams. Get crystal clear on where you’re going and why, then trust your people to chart the course. And if you’re unsure they got it? Ask them to repeat it back. If they stumble, the clarity needs work.
3. Trust Isn’t Given—It’s Built One Conversation at a Time
Trust is the foundation of any high-performing team. But here’s the truth: it’s not a given. It’s built. One moment, one conversation, one decision at a time.
“Trust is either being deposited or withdrawn with every interaction.”
Trust starts with you. I give it freely until someone gives me a reason not to—and that rarely happens. The key is to consistently show up with integrity, competence, and care. That means owning your role, being transparent about decisions, and creating space for people to connect beyond the task list.
Want a practical way to build trust? Create routine check-ins that are agenda-free. Use them to learn about your people. Talk about their hobbies, their families, their challenges. Not every connection has to be about productivity. In fact, the best ones rarely are.
✅ Takeaway: Trust isn’t a light switch. It’s a daily practice. Prioritize connection, consistency, and competence—and the trust will follow.
4. Embrace Extreme Leadership—Own the Outcomes, Share the Credit
Leadership isn’t about delegation and distance—it’s about presence and ownership. What I call “extreme leadership” means holding yourself fully responsible for how your team performs. Not just in outcomes, but in readiness, support, and execution.
I remember running a training exercise that completely unraveled. On paper, it was routine. But I got complacent. I assumed what worked last time would work again. I didn’t check in enough, didn’t adapt the plan, didn’t ensure alignment. And sure enough, things went sideways.
Afterward, I stood in front of the team and said, “This one’s on me.” I didn’t sugarcoat it. I broke down exactly where I fell short. Not because I wanted sympathy—but because I wanted the team to see that accountability starts at the top.
This approach creates a ripple effect. When leaders take real ownership, it models behavior. It tells your people it’s safe to do the same. And before you know it, you’ve built a culture of proactive accountability—not fear-based compliance.
✅ Takeaway: Extreme leadership means asking, “What could I have done differently?” before asking anything of your team. Own the outcome, share the credit, and always lead from the front.
5. Make Mistakes Safe—That’s Where Real Growth Lives
For years, we operated under the belief that mistakes were career-ending. That failure was something to hide or survive. But that mindset kills innovation. If your people are afraid to fail, they’ll never try something bold. And without boldness, you’ll never grow.
That’s why I’ve become a huge proponent of creating psychological safety. In the military, we do this through After Action Reviews (AARs). These structured debriefs ask three simple questions:
- What happened?
- What went well?
- What didn’t—and how can we improve?
But here’s the catch: AARs only work if your people feel safe enough to speak honestly. If they fear retribution, the insights vanish. Psychological safety means team members can challenge, question, and contribute without fear of retribution. Learn more about how to create psychological safety in your team. That’s why building a culture where mistakes are normalized—and debriefs are expected—is mission-critical.
✅ Takeaway: Innovation lives on the other side of safe failure. Make mistakes safe, make learning sacred, and watch your team evolve.
Final Thoughts: Why Military Leadership Works Everywhere
The leadership lessons forged in uniform don’t stay on the battlefield. Whether you’re leading a corporate team, a nonprofit, or a fast-growing startup, these principles apply:
- Model what you expect.
- Clarify the mission.
- Build personal trust.
- Own every outcome.
- Encourage growth through safe failure.
These aren’t abstract theories—they’re boots-on-the-ground truths. If you’re serious about becoming the kind of leader others want to follow—not just obey—then make these principles your standard operating procedure.
💡 Reflection Prompt: Which of these lessons are you already applying—and which could shift your leadership to the next level? Take the Leadership Pattern Quiz to find out what’s shaping your leadership style right now.
✅ Call to Action
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🧑💼 About the Author
Scott McCarthy is a senior Canadian Army officer and the founder of Moving Forward Leadership, where he helps leaders develop clarity, confidence, and capacity through elite coaching and training programs. Host of the Moving Forward Leadership Podcast, Scott draws on 20+ years of high-stakes leadership to guide today’s managers to perform at their peak.